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The Best Oktoberfest Tips…*

Are you heading out for Oktoberfest Marathon? There are a few things you might want to know first and the team from SmartBuyGlasses have created their top tips.

1. Calling it the ‘Wiesn’ will make you look like an insider
Oktoberfest is affectionately known as the “Wiesn” by locals, after the Theresienwiese, or the plot of land on which it takes place (which, confusingly, is named after the princess Therese. Make sense?).

2. Get dressed up!
“Oktoberfest without dressing up is like a Halloween party without a costume: it’s still a lot of fun, but the right outfit can make it even better”. A surprising amount of people will be dressed in tracht, the traditional attire worn in Bavaria, whether it is for a man or a woman. Lederhosen and the dirndl emerged from the peasant farming communities of Bavaria, where they were first adopted in the 16th century, to gain wider appeal and cultural acceptance. Nowadays wearing a lederhosen or dirndl is expressing individual styles. Of course a pair of sunglasses is the perfect way to show your individuality and keep your eyes protected if the sun happens to be shining. Head to www.smartbuyglasses.co.uk to find the perfect pair.

Hint for the guys: If a lady’s bow on a dirndl is on the left side then she’s single, on the right side she’s taken, and in the middle means she is a virgin.

3. Pace yourself! You don’t want to end up among the “Bierleichen” (literally: beer corpses)
Yep! This word is real in german language. The Wiesn-goers who indulge perhaps one too many and pass out by 4pm. In an effort to keep festival attendees as safe, the Red Cross has set up 15 hangover beds for people, in case they need to sleep off the booze for a while. That doesn’t seem like a lot for the more than 7,000 people that come to the Red Cross tent for treatment each year, but I guess it’s better than none. They’ve also got spare pants, too, just in case you need them.

Always remember: It’s a marathon, not a sprint – You’ll be drinking all day

4. Soak it up! Forget wurst – it is all about roasted chicken!
Around 482,361 roast chickens are devoured at Oktoberfest, compared to only 112,772 pairs of pork sausage. Typically, half a roasted chicken is served with a giant-sized pretzel. The really hungry may like to head to the Ochsenbraterei, where they can enjoy ox roasted on a spit.

5. Put your foot on the table and chug your entire beer.
A foot on the table signals the tent that you are prepared to chug your entire stein and backing out is not an option. This tradition is the primary entertainment for the first few hours of the day when everyone is still calm and seated. If you’re successful, you will be rewarded with the entire tent cheering for you.

6. Don’t put your foot on the table and chug your entire beer.
As mentioned above, a foot on the table equals you drinking a litre of beer quickly in front some 5000-8000 spectators. If you’re daring enough to try, it’s important to realize that your failure will also equal 5000-8000 spectators mercilessly booing you so make damn sure you can follow through on your commitments.

7. Know how to flirt and learn German
Remembering the pinafore knot!? If the lady is single, a simple I mog di (“I like/love you”) will open a conversation. You can also call her fesch (pretty) or siass (cute). Whatever you decide to do or to say, better not call her Gaudinockerl (lit. lovely dumplings — no need to spell it out). This is going to be the shortest conversation ever. No girl wants to be called a dumpling. It’s not cute. No. lf it all does not help to win the heart of the lady, buy her a ginger bread heart and take her for a ride on the rollercoaster. She will love it!

8. Last but not least: Know your hangover cure
Aspirin, Coca Cola, Water, Burger, Fries, Schnitzel, ….

Have a great Oktoberfest guys!

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Squibb Vicious is also known as Haydy.

She can often be found travelling the world to fly her drone and petting people’s dogs. Big fan of staycations, long walks and taking too many photos.
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