When you’ve been living with a guy for two to three years, sometimes he can get stuck in his ways and used to the fact that you’re around all of the time. You’re ready and waiting for him to pop the question, but it seems like he hasn’t even thought of it — so why not drop a few hints to your man so that he knows that you’re truly ready to become engaged?
Together with Angelic Diamonds, retailers of bespoke marquise engagement rings, I’ve come up with a few points for your husband-to-be in the direction of a big proposal.
Keep your friends close, but your married friends closer
If you know that your boyfriend is slightly worried or anxious about getting engaged, make sure he hangs around with your married friends. This will make him realise that you’re comfortable with him being around others in more serious relationships.
Married friends will help show your other half that marriage has its ups and downs, but this commitment shown through other people will help him envision this with you. Although men who have parents that are divorced sometimes struggle to trust this commitment, replacing negative feelings with positive ones in this type of environment may help to bring him around to your way of thinking.
Become his go-to guy
Sometimes when you’re in a relationship, you both have your assigned roles; never fall into a routine, and make sure that you can be your partner’s go-to guy as well as a girlfriend. If you’re constantly being left behind for the guys, then this is going to put a strain on his ability to propose and take you seriously.
Try and become the complete package; go for runs together and take an interest in his interests and hobbies. If you can be part of his whole life, rather than just someone he spends time with, then he’ll feel like you’re indispensable. Once you get to this point in your relationship, then he’ll feel like proposing, as he can’t spend his time without you!
Show some tough love
Although many don’t like to do this, sometimes you need to be cruel to be kind. If you don’t see your relationship heading in the right direction, and things are flatlining, try and find his pulse again by telling him you may move out.
Or, if you don’t want to be as dramatic, why not try changing careers without letting him know, or spending more time with the girls unannounced? Although he knows that you’re always there for him, this will make him feel that he isn’t being as included as he should be, and he’ll start to wonder why. Keeping him on his toes in this way will make him realise that he needs to put the effort in (by proposing!) so that he can get your undivided effort and attention in the future.
Honesty is the best policy
Although there are many hints and tricks you could use to get your other half to propose, sometimes communication really is key to the success of a relationship. If you want to get engaged, then why not talk to him about why it’s important to you.
If you can tell him why you want to marry him, then the likelihood is he’ll know how much he means to you. Sometimes people have the same fears and doubts within a relationship, but they are just too afraid to address them with each other. By talking about your future together, he’ll know that you want to be a part of it. By giving him that gentle nudge in the right direction, you may just be engaged before you know it.
One response to “How to Drop Hints so that he knows you’re Ready to get Engaged *”
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Interesting blog, love most of it… the bit on proposal stunned and alarmed me!
HOW TO DROP HINTS SO THAT HE KNOWS YOU’RE READY TO GET ENGAGED *
When you’ve been living with a guy for two to three years, sometimes he can get stuck in his ways and used to the fact that you’re around all of the time. You’re ready and waiting for him to pop the question, but it seems like he hasn’t even thought of it — so why not drop a few hints to your man so that he knows that you’re truly ready to become engaged?
Get stuck in his ways? Maybe this is true, we can all get stuck in our ways, or maybe he isn’t ready to propose, or maybe he wants to one day, plans to but you just don’t know it. Drop a few hints? The best hint you could drop is to propose yourself. In a world without sexism and equality there is no reason why you can’t. Maybe he’ll even say yes.
If you know that your boyfriend is slightly worried or anxious about getting engaged, make sure he hangs around with your married friends. This will make him realise that you’re comfortable with him being around others in more serious relationships.
This is not normal! This is conditioning him to feel a certain way. Perhaps if he is worried or anxious then try addressing those concerns. What are his reasons for these feelings? Communicate with him. ‘This will make him realise….’ Will it? What if it makes him realise that this life isn’t for him? Dangerous path to take. He’s a human being, he is capable of making his own mind up. And are you using your married friends for personal gain? Spend time with the people you want to spend time with just because you enjoy their company.
Become his go-to guy
Sometimes when you’re in a relationship, you both have your assigned roles; never fall into a routine, and make sure that you can be your partner’s go-to guy as well as a girlfriend. If you’re constantly being left behind for the guys, then this is going to put a strain on his ability to propose and take you seriously. – So so much scares me about this statement! If you’re with the right guy then him spending time with the guys will have absolutely no bearing on his desire or ‘ability’ as you put it to propose to you. If he wants to marry you, he will propose when he is ready.
Try and become the complete package; go for runs together and take an interest in his interests and hobbies. If you can be part of his whole life, rather than just someone he spends time with, then he’ll feel like you’re indispensable. Once you get to this point in your relationship, then he’ll feel like proposing, as he can’t spend his time without you! – It never hurts to show an interest in your partners hobbies. But do it because you want to show an interest, NOT because you want something from him (i.e, a proposal!). Love and relationships should be natural.
Although many don’t like to do this, sometimes you need to be cruel to be kind. If you don’t see your relationship heading in the right direction, and things are flatlining, try and find his pulse again by telling him you may move out. – Isn’t this blackmail??? Or…. talk to him! Communicate, communicate, communicate. You have a right to want to get married as much as he has a right to not be ready to get married… work out if you’re heading in the same direction by having a conversation…. or of course, just move out(?!).
Or, if you don’t want to be as dramatic, why not try changing careers without letting him know, or spending more time with the girls unannounced? Although he knows that you’re always there for him, this will make him feel that he isn’t being as included as he should be, and he’ll start to wonder why. Keeping him on his toes in this way will make him realise that he needs to put the effort in (by proposing!) so that he can get your undivided effort and attention in the future. – Changing careers? To get a proposal?? Erm, you’ve lost me here.. follow the career you want to follow and don’t let your personal life dictate that is my view. Of course, sacrifices and choices may need to be made but just changing career for the sake of it I don’t think will have any affect on the situation.
Spending time with the girls unannounced… do you have to announce everything you do anyway? Don’t play games, if you want to see your friends, see your friends, he loves you, he trusts you. This also goes against your idea of spending loads of time with him (being his go to person) so that he can’t be without you. But lets go with your theory and in that world then remember that he too may want to spend time with his friends unannounced (which is fine), but are you ready for that change which you’ve just initiated?
Honesty is the best policy – HONEST IS THE BEST POLICY. I 100% agree! Which makes your first 4 points redundant. Don’t change careers for the wrong reasons (dishonest), don’t threaten to move out (not honest)..etc etc, you get my point.
If you can tell him why you want to marry him, then the likelihood is he’ll know how much he means to you. Sometimes people have the same fears and doubts within a relationship, but they are just too afraid to address them with each other. By talking about your future together, he’ll know that you want to be a part of it. By giving him that gentle nudge in the right direction, you may just be engaged before you know it. – Well said! Makes for a shorter article but these are the real steps to ‘getting what you want’.
A partner (male or female) is a wonderful thing. A partner is a human, not a pet. Oh, and a proposal – comes when it is ready from the person that is doing the proposing.
Good luck!